ROCK BOTTOM
That year, we made lots of progress. We were actually starting to have some good days. Maybe just one here and there, but a full good day was something to celebrate. We still, however, had the bad days and horrible days. We were basically eating homemade food as much as possible but still ate out at times, just tried to make better choices while we ate out. He was still having highs and again after that came the lows.
The Summer he turned 9 was Rock Bottom. One specific evening, my son was having an extreme low. I was laying in bed, he came in and handed me a letter. His face was covered in tears. A letter that stayed engraved in my head for many months to come. He wrote that he wished he wasn't alive anymore. I can't even write the words he wrote on that letter, it's too much for my heart to handle. The stress of his highs and lows had just gotten to be too much for him to handle. That night I prayed more than I ever prayed before, for my son to find peace and happiness in his body. To give me the strength to keep going. To help me find the path to help my boy who has the kindness soul you'll ever meet.
That Summer, well, that was last Summer, I met a lady that lives down the street. This lady happened to be my son's friend's mother. Her son had been playing with my son our front yard for 2 years. When he first started coming over, I actually had to send him home because he wasn't able to follow our house rules. I would soon learn that he had many of the same struggles as my son. I saw him grow and change over the couple years. When I met his mother, we had much to talk about. Little did I know, she was the guide I had asked for.
